The Power of Yes Dear

I was with a group of single woman, chit chatting about the various stages of our love lives. Two of the ladies were dating divorced men.  In the conversation, someone shared how her partner let her have her way in a certain situation.  When the lady him asked why him immediately backed down, he said “I didn’t want any problems.”  My reply was, “Ahhhh, he has mastered the Power of Yes Dear.”  Hence, the catalyst for this piece.

“Yes Dear” can make life soooo much easier. At least that’s what I hear. I haven’t had a long history with the practice myself, but I’m getting a taste.  Continue reading The Power of Yes Dear

Don’t you Know No Good?

Have you ever heard someone speak about a person you’ve known in such an unflattering way that you couldn’t believe this to be the same person you knew? “They’re no good.” “They’re a womanizer.” “They just ain’t ‘bout shit.”  How can a good person turn into such a person that someone else just wishes they would evaporate?

I’ve always had platonic, male friends.  Some people don’t think that’s possible, but it is.  When my male friends open up to me about their emotions, I often find hidden hurt.  Make that hidden and unhealed hurt.  Have you ever heard the phrase Hurt People Hurt People?  If not, it basically says that when people hurt someone else, it’s usually because they are hurt. Continue reading Don’t you Know No Good?

“Lessons from Losers in Love” is Here!

I just released my latest project, a book entitled “Lessons from Losers in Love” on September 13th, one day after my 40-somethingth birthday.  This 230 page book is a compilation of stories from 22 people from all over the world (yes, I got international submissions) about loves they lost and the lessons they learned in the long run.  The stories come from a very diverse group – men, women, disabled, Christian, Mormon, a farmer, a politician, different orientations, different ethnicities, etc.  I’m very proud of the diversity represented, but I’m most proud for the universality of us all overcoming adversity and learning from those experiences.  Anyway, if you are looking for some new reading material over the weekend, I’d appreciate the support.  The book is available on Amazon.com.  Thanks in advance for your support.

Lessons_from_Losers__Cover_for_Kindle

https://www.amazon.com/Lessons-Losers-Love-Relationships-Valuable/dp/0578184141/ref=sr_1_1?s=books&ie=UTF8&qid=1474035618&sr=1-1&keywords=lessons+from+losers+in+love

 

Being a Priority

I’m a lover.  I love hard. If I’m into you, you are my priority and I want you to feel just that.  Often times that has led to me being taken for granted. I digress. Eventually, things settle and we just don’t cut it anymore.  That’s cool. Almost every man I had a relationship with eventually came back to speak of their regrets. I treated them very well and they took advantage.  They apologized. Better late than never. Whatever.  I have great friendships with many of them, still to this day. They’re “my boys” now and I love them…just not like that. Continue reading Being a Priority

The One

We always hear about finding THE ONE.  Some of us think every time we meet a new person that we have a mutual attraction with that they might be THE ONE.   What about THE ONE that got away? THE ONE is always THE ONE until the relationship ends and we can’t believe we wasted our time.  What?  I thought they were THE ONE?  What happened?  How did that change?  Continue reading The One

Accepting Love

I completed a survey on character strengths from U Penn and one question asked if you are able to accept love. Say what now? “Are you able to accept love?”  I paused on the questionnaire.  It was a dumb question to me initially.  Then I stopped to figure out why that question was even on there (yeah, I get pretty deep in thought over small things at times).  Eventually, it made sense. It then explained some behaviors of some people I know. They can’t accept love. The closer they get to someone or the more emotionally connected they become, they act out or push them away purposely.  They can’t accept love. Continue reading Accepting Love