I’ve written about social media’s impact on those who feel that everyone else’s life is better than theirs because their social media timeline shows them so. Although this topic is similar in nature, it’s actually the reverse. Are you comfortable sharing your true personal life on social media?
I remember when Facebook started to become really popular. On my timeline, most of my friends posted almost daily, sharing the ins and outs of their lives. It was pretty awesome seeing my friends who now live in places I’d need to book a flight to visit instead of driving down the street. I could watch their children grow through posted family pics. I could praise their accomplishments. I could even snoop into their personal lives even harder than they shared by clicking on their friends’ profile pictures and see what’s going on in their lives as well. It’s all good fun for me. Continue reading Social Media vs. Real Life
“Where the heck did I come from?” Some people find themselves asking this question about their own families. Their family’s view on life is very different from their own. They don’t align. They are the black sheep, if you will. Some people embrace the differences that their families bring and have pride in the varied relatives with different thoughts, actions, and lifestyles. There are others who find themselves embarrassed about their families and try to keep certain parts of their backgrounds a secret. Then, there are a set of people who fall right in between. Continue reading Family Culture – Can You Relate?
I apologize if I make it look easy. It’s not. I know many people experience difficulties. Scratch that – EVERYBODY experiences difficulties, but it’s not obvious to most. We typically don’t announce our shortcomings or negative experiences, but we blast our happy moments. In actuality, we all experience the good and bad. However, when you’re going through your bad and everyone is speaking of their good, it seems like you are the only person with negative experiences and; therefore, your life must be worse than everyone else’s. That’s simply not true. Continue reading If I Make it Look Easy
I just released my latest project, a book entitled “Lessons from Losers in Love” on September 13th, one day after my 40-somethingth birthday. This 230 page book is a compilation of stories from 22 people from all over the world (yes, I got international submissions) about loves they lost and the lessons they learned in the long run. The stories come from a very diverse group – men, women, disabled, Christian, Mormon, a farmer, a politician, different orientations, different ethnicities, etc. I’m very proud of the diversity represented, but I’m most proud for the universality of us all overcoming adversity and learning from those experiences. Anyway, if you are looking for some new reading material over the weekend, I’d appreciate the support. The book is available on Amazon.com. Thanks in advance for your support.
Lessons from Losers in Love:True Stories from Failed Relationships that Turned into Valuable Life Lessons is a collection of 22 personal stories from around the world that deals with love, loss, and lessons. The chapters include lessons on Toxic Bonds, Facades and Religion, Multiple Partners, Rejection, Finding Myself, Deception, Redemption, and Self-Revelation.
Available on Amazon.com in paperback and Kindle.
It’s not you, it’s me. Have you ever been told that infamous break up line? It is horrendous. It explains nothing. It says nothing. You leave with nothing. They might as well just abruptly stop talking to you and let you figure out that they are gone.
Most of us adults have had a relationship or two (or multiple ones). In at least one, I would assume that you got dumped. It’s just not logical and realistic that you were always the dumper. With that in mind, your partner had to tell you that they wanted out at some point. Sometimes we’re devastated, but rarely is it a complete surprise. There are usually signs when things head south. We just usually pretend they aren’t happening. Then when our partner says they want out, we look confused and ask why. Depending on the jerkiness level of that partner depends on the response you are given. It may be an honest truth, a mix of truth and lie, a damn lie, or something that says nothing like, “It’s not you, it’s me.” Continue reading Dumped for a Reason
Yes, I have secretly called many men my future ex-husbands. Why? Well, because they are simply men I’ve had crushes on, but I know damn well if I got with them in real life, we’d be over before we really began – hence the term, my future ex-husband.
See, I’ve learned to enjoy the excitement of fantasy. I may see a super handsome dude online and lust til my little heart is content, but in actuality, that dude will probably not keep my attention. Looks aren’t everything. He may be fine today, but will he still be fine two years from now? Will that chiseled six-pack all the women trace with their fingers on their computer screens turn into a keg? Probably so. Does fineness even matter in a relationship? Nope, not at all. What if he’s fine, but can’t even speak in proper English when need be? I know I speak country hood at times, but I also know how to code switch and wax eloquently if the time is right. Can he do the same? Can fine dude even read? That’s a prerequisite. So for all his sexiness, he may not have anything else going for him. That can’t work for me. Continue reading Heeeeyyy, Future Ex-Husband!
Caring for loved ones can be an emotional journey for the family members whether they are the caregiver or the person being cared for. No one wants to be in the position that others have to be forced to care for them. It’s uncomfortable. It may cause feelings of guilt. It may even cause feelings of shame. Yet, we can’t control what happens to our health as we age…or can we? Continue reading The Caregiver
I don’t want your dog jumping on me to meet me at the door. Sorry, I just don’t. I don’t care how “friendly” it may be or if it “just wants to play.” Keep your dog out of my space. Some were just offended by my statement, but that’s fine. When you come to my house, I don’t unleash my children and have them jump on you, sniff your legs, or attempt to lick your face. Yes, it’s the same thing.
See, boundaries apply to every aspect of our lives. If you allow your pet to violate a personal space boundary without thinking twice about it, you may allow other boundaries to be violated as well. Don’t get me wrong. I’m not saying that everyone who has a dog doesn’t know how to respect boundaries. Just stay with me. Continue reading Stay in Your Lane, Literally. Boundaries and Beyond.
You had your heart set on something. It happened just as you imagined. Then day one, you realize that thing you wanted is no longer there. It’s no longer right. It no longer looks like you imagined early on or felt the way it did initially. What happened? How did this failure happen? How will things go from this point forward?
We’ve all had these types of experiences. If you haven’t, you will. Give it time. For those of us who have had the pleasure of failure, we typically can look back and see that we are in a different space now and we overcame that situation. Now some of you are still stuck on me calling your failure pleasant. Maybe I’m a masochistic. I don’t know, but I am one of those people who appreciate the unpleasant times because they are usually followed by very pleasant ones.
A few years ago, I spoke to a friend who divorced. They tried to describe what they were going through. All they kept clearly repeating was that they felt like a failure. They did not know what to tell their family and friends about the demise of the union. They thought that people would blame them personally or pick sides. At that point, I could only listen because I could not fully relate. However, their words of failure suck deep within. Continue reading Not All Failures Are Failures